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The Orange Tree's Holistic Guide to Self Love

Updated: Jan 10, 2022

I cannot stress enough the importance of self Love.

The key thing to remember is that you are literally MADE of love! You are made of the same fabric that makes up everything in existence! Everything that you've done in the past, has happened as to give you opportunities for growth.

You were SUPPOSED to make mistakes! Everything is, exactly as it's supposed to be. You are already a success!

Start making friends with that voice in your head...the one that narrates your life. Take the reigns again and recognise that you have the power to control your thoughts. Start practicing only allowing loving thoughts to be entertained in your mind. Treat yourself with the same kind, loving, compassion that you'd show anyone you love. Talk to yourself as if you are talking to your best friend...with patience and understanding for your mistakes. Focus on just today and staying present and allow all the fears and worries and memories to just fade away...after all fears come from your ego and well memories...they're just memories. All that is real is this present moment. Namaste! (NB: Did you know the word Namaste actually means "The Spirit within me salutes the Spirit in you")

There are LOADS of great ways you can boost your self love...


Amethyst: Amethyst helps you to get in tune with and connected to your emotions. A lot of us are good at blocking out our emotions, ignoring them or letting them control us. Amethyst will help you to work with your emotions. 

Amazonite: If you’re looking to not only embrace your inner truth, but express it as well, amazonite is the crystal for you. It has a very strong but tender energy. 

Howlite: Howlite helps you to be totally comfortable with yourself. Silly quirks and all. 

Lepidolite: This crystal encourages you to have a divine connection with your higher self. Connecting with your higher self, in a divine manner, helps you more easily work with your intuition and your true self. 

Rose Quartz: No list of self love crystals would be complete without talking about rose quartz. This is the Big Mama of love crystals. Self love, tenderness, compassion and inner peace and forgiveness. 


I’m sure it comes as no surprise that the heart chakra boosting diet, is one that is full of greens. Why not start the day with a matcha green smoothie and throw in some leafy greens, avocado, lime, cucumber, mint and a kiwi fruit. You’ll be beaming with love! Got other green smoothie recipes you can share? Add them to the forum!

Green Vegetables: spinach, zucchini, kale, Brussels sprouts, broccoli, Asian greens, beans, silverbeet, peas and asparagus

Green fruits: kiwi fruit, green apples, green grapes, cucumbers, avocado and limes.

Green superfoods: spirulina, chlorella, wheatgrass, barley grass, matcha powder and green tea.

Herbs: coriander, mint, oregano, parsley, thyme, rosemary, tarragon, basil and sage.

Bachs flower remedies

Rescue Remedy: Help any stressful situation where you need to be able to collect yourself and be in charge of your emotions.

Oak: Helps you when your inner strength wanes. Usually because you are an over-achiever and will overwork and ignore your tiredness.

Cherry Plum: When you feel like exploding and fear that you may lose control of your emotions and actions.

White Chestnut: Helps you when your mind is cluttered with thoughts, usually arguments, ideas, thoughts which you do not wish to keep repeating in your mind. These thoughts might prevent you from sleeping.

Oak: When you struggle on without taking care of yourself, workaholic, wont take a break no matter how much it is needed

Larch: When you lost self-esteem

Pine: helps to restore a positive sense of inner self-value or self worth. Those in need of Pine suffer from feelings of guilt, shame, self-blame or self reproach and will often take responsibility for, or even apologize for, something that has nothing to do with them at all. They are never truly satisfied with themselves and tend to feel that others are better than they are. It is difficult for those in this state to find any real sense of achievement or joy in life.

Essential Oils

This is not an exhaustive list. Any oil that helps you better care for yourself can be an essential oil for self-love. These oils below are specifically geared toward the old habits and patterns and beliefs that keep you stuck when you’re ready to move forward out of such limiting ideas, but find the emotional baggage is cramping your style.

Bergamot – Bergamot oil is all about one's sense of self: self-love, self-worth, self-acceptance, self-judgment, self-hatred. This oil helps us do the work necessary to step out of our fears of not being good enough, or our habits of holding back for fear of rejection of Who We Are, and helps us to learn to love and accept ourselves. It teaches us to find validation within, accept our own authenticity, and not spend so much time worrying about what others will think about it.

It also helps us in processing and releasing fear, criticism, need for approval, shame, and emotional pain. It may also help with feeling like a failure, or feelings of inadequacy, inferiority, or worthlessness by helping us step into our own confidence, empowerment, ability to play bigger, self-approval and joyfulness.

Ylang ylang – open your heart to itself

White Fir – releasing generational patterns

Cypress – for unsticking the stuckness

Choose the oil that you’re most attracted to. For emotional uses you want to use the oil aromatically, such as in a diffuser. You can diffuse while you’re journaling, meditating, working, eating, driving, but most importantly while you’re using your affirmations for self-love.


Lack of self love is linked to the heart chakra which is healed using the colours green and pink. Try bringing these colours into your life through clothing, blankets, accessories, bed sheets, wall paint, food etc. Another great way of literally immersing yourself in green and pink is to buy a natural coloured bath bomb which literally turns your bath into a healing treatment.

Meditations & Mantras


Meditation is an excellent tool to help you manage day to day stress and anxiety as well as helping you gain perspective on life and past experiences. There are tonnes of guided meditations online, including many on youtube.

Use positive affirmations whenever you feel you’re stuck in negative thinking. You can retrain yourself to think positively, to imagine what might go right, to see the best in a situation and to learn from adversity.

Daily affirmations are useful tools designed for lowering anxiety, reducing stress, increasing self love, overcoming negative self-talk, and awakening us to positive change.

Often when overwhelmed with self hatred, guilt and negativity, quieting the mind may feel like an impossible feat. Embrace the practice of deep breathing is an excellent way to manage your thoughts and relax the body prior to using affirmations. Here’s how:

Inhale, with nice and long, deep breaths through the nose. Feel your lungs fill, all the way to the diaphragm. Make your breathing very deep (but never force anything). On the exhale, with mouth remaining closed; slowly push out air using the abdomen until you feel your lungs are basically empty. It’s the exhale that elicits incredibly deep relaxation in the body! Visualize negativity leaving the body with each exhale. Feel the mind and muscles relaxing. Repeat several times until you feel yourself become calmer and your thoughts stop racing (they continue, but they’re not frantic)

Now, it’s time to add some affirmations! Choose from the affirmations below, the ones that resonate with you, meaning they feel good to you when you say them. These affirmations are suggestions and you can customize them to suit your unique needs. First and foremost, make sure that they feel good. The idea is to create positive feelings in you, so that when you say these affirmations next time, you’re automatically creating a neural connection not only with the words you say but with the emotions those words bring up.


I love myself.

I am a beautiful with a unique spirit.

There is no one else quite like me.I

am worthy of love.

As a creature on this earth,

I am worthy of being loved and cherished by others.

My worth is untarnished by my imperfections or the way others see me.

I am worthy of good things.

It is ok to want the best for myself and to pursue the things that bring me joy and happiness.

I can choose positive thoughts.

I understand the power of my self-talk and choose to select thoughts that are uplifting and positive.

I let my happiness be visible to others.

My happiness overflows from me.

I can use my happiness to bring joy to others

.I am strong.

I have many strengths that I use to navigate the ups and downs of my life.

I am tougher and braver than I look.

I am becoming.

I am becoming the person I want to be.

Each day, I work to make myself more the person I want to be.

My life is moving forward perfectly.

Each bump in the road is there for a reason.

Everything is happening according to a greater plan.

I am confident in my decisions.

I am the creator of my own destiny.

I stand behind the things I do and say.

I surround myself with loving people.

I can choose the people I allow into my life.

I choose to surround myself with people who love and adore me.

For the next few weeks, pick one self-loving mantra and try to incorporate it into your internal dialogue - one at a time for a full week. Of course, if you don’t feel like that one is providing you any benefits, feel free to switch it up. You will find that some mantras are more fitting to your needs and personality, as your internal dialogue is unique to you. If you find something that works for you, it should only be a matter of days before you start feeling more confident and loved.

Disclaimer: Please remember that anything discussed here does not constitute medical advice and cannot substitute for appropriate medical care. Where essential oils are mentioned, it’s recommended you use only pure, unadulterated organic essential oils and follow the safety directions of the manufacturer.

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